Monthly Archives: August 2008

Olympic Gymnastics– Holy Cow!

auto-olympics-gymnastics-306292When you think Olympics, you think Michael Phelps. Phelps has been plastered all over the past ten issues of Sports Illustrated. He has TV commercials on seemingly every channel. The guy is everywhere.

I simply don’t care for swimming, and not only because I’ve always sunk like a lead balloon. I just find it a terribly dull sport to watch. Ultimately, swimming (albeit quickly) back and forth in a pool and breaking some record previously held by a guy named Spitz doesn’t do it for me. You want tizzy-inducing, Olympic material? Lets talk about women’s gymnastics.

I had never watched gymnastics for more than two minutes before watching the women’s all-around competition. This is insane stuff! Shawn Johnson, Nastia Liuken and a couple of pre-pubescent Chinese girls flipped and bounced over a 4-inch balance beam as though it were a 4-lane freeway. Have you ever tried to stand on a balance beam, let alone attempt a backflip on one? I tried once (to stand on one) during a 4th grade P.E. class and my cajones are still paying for it.

Gymnasts should be recognized as some of the greatest athletes in the world, but they aren’t. And the problem perhaps lies in the Barbie-doll image cultivated within the sport’s culture. The athletes are world-class, but they appear as caricatures taken from the same vein as the beauty contest winners from Little Miss Sunshine. This image, further accentuated by Johnson’s cuddly-chipmunk appearance throughout the Olympics, prevents many people from taking the sport seriously or from seeing the athletes as the impressive packages of power and grace that they are. What gymnastics really needs is a Dennis Rodman, someone with a little extra dose of bravado. A fiery, in-your-face gymnast could raise public awareness and simultaneously help to diminish the cute-as-a-button image the sport has acquired over the years. While we’re at it, can’t you imagine Rodman in a pink leotard attempting a series of back flips off the uneven bars? Somehow, it doesn’t seem so far-fetched…

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I’ll be on vacation until I find a way to get internet access in my apt. Until then, toil away, try to make due with run-of-the-mill sports information sites such as ESPN and SI.com. A few subjects to consider in my absence:

  • Brett Favre’s devolution from iconic sports hero to prima-donna idiot.
  • Paul Byrd’s impact on the Sox rotation.
  • Olympic Gymnasts. How the deuce do they go flipping around like that?

This and more next time….

cb

I’m Out

Aside

Manny Trade Restores Team Concept

Manny RamirezI write for a website called the “Boston Red Sox Fan Site” and so it is with a considerable degree of shame and embarrassment that I sit here and confess that, for the past few years, I haven’t been much of a Sox fan. I’ve retained my Sox memorabilia and paraphernalia, I’ve watched the games here and there, I’ve carried the company card (not literally, of course–anyone who purchases a “Red Sox Nation” card to validate his or her fandom should be bashed over the head with a wiffle bat). But my heart and my soul, the heart and soul I used to pour into every pitch of every inning, were off taking an extended, seventh-inning stretch.

What a difference a trade makes.

I was more into last night’s 2-1 victory over the Oakland A’s than I was into any of the Sox’ World Series games this past October. All of a sudden the Sox spunk was back. The hustle, the grit, the team dynamic; the intangibles that, I always used to fancy, separated us from the heart-less Yankees; all this came as the result of exchanging Manny Ramirez for Jason Bay.

The Sox are no longer a collection of talented ballplayers held hostage under the prima-donna swagger of a millionaire gun-for-hire. By replacing Manny with his natural antithesis, (Bay, an unassuming, team-first ballplayer), the Sox restored their dignity and dropped the traveling circus routine. They became a team again. And a baseball team is what I’ve been waiting and hoping to root for.

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Deadline Deal Ratings

mark-teixeiraLast week I droned on about the mind-numbing dullness of baseball’s mid-season. This week I’m eating my words.

Lets break down the two biggest trade deadline deals.

  • Teixeira to the Halos: Braves trade Teixeira, who will become a free agent after this season, for Casey Kotchman (he of the .280 batting average, 12 dingers and 55 RBI). How did the Braves get fleeced here? They get a legitimate, starting first baseman who is excited about playing in Atlanta and who should hang round for a while. In return, they surrender a three-month rental player. Immediate advantage: Halos. Long-term advantage: Braves.
  • Manny to Dodgers: This is ludicrous, the biggest coup of Theo’s tenure. The Sox are instantly improved by obliterating the biggest team distraction this side of the Marlins’ Manatees.  As a bonus, they get Bay, a consummate professional who will bolster team chemistry and bring similar numbers to the table. Harp all you want about the “presence” Manny brought to the lineup. Presence shmesence. Manny’s numbers dont elevate him above the field anymore. Sure, he has superior career numbers, but he isn’t the fearsome hitter he once was. I’ll take Bay with his hustle, superior range in leftfield, and similar if not better offensive numbers. Winners: Sox.  Loser: Joe Torre.
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